Academic intelligence offers virtually no preparation for the trials and tribulations that life inevitably places before each and every one of us. Despite the enormous body of evidence illuminating the fact that high IQ is no guarantee of success, our culture remains fixated on academic intelligence; yet emotional intelligence is crucial to understanding why one person thrives while another of equal intelligence does not. Emotional aptitude can be seen as a meta-ability, determining how well we use whatever other skills we have, including raw intellect. Research shows that people who are emotionally adept--who know and manage their own feelings well, and can read and deal effectively with other people's feelings--are at an advantage in any domain of life, from romance to politics, and more likely to be content and effective in their lives. When unable to exert control over our emotional life, we find ourselves caught in fighting inner battles that sabotage our ability for clear thinking and focused work.

The emotional brain can overpower, even paralyze, the thinking brain. When angry, depressed, or anxious we are unable to take in information or process information efficiently or effectively. On the other hand, good moods enhance the ability to think flexibly and with more complexity, making it easier to find solutions to any nature of problem. (This suggests a way to help someone think through a problem, rather than pressuring them to "think harder," is to take a fun break or tell a joke.)

Researchers are finding that hope and optimism play a surprisingly potent role in life. People with optimism and hope bounce back from failures and approach things in terms of how to handle them rather than worrying about what can go wrong. The emotions have a powerful effect on the autonomic nervous system, which regulates everything from how much insulin is secreted to blood pressure levels. The adverse effects of anger, anxiety, and depression on wellbeing, stand beyond dispute. Chronic anger and anxiety can make people more susceptible to a range of diseases; and depression impedes recovery from physical diseases and heightens risk of death. The good news is that if chronic emotional distress is toxic, the opposite range of emotions can be a tonic.

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