Being right is, for most of us, a cherished value - albeit one we generally hold and pursue unconsciously. At its root, being right" is the basis of all prejudice, and leads to acts of discrimination ranging from bullying and ridiculing to segregation and murder, torture, and war. Thinking that we are right while others are wrong and acting accordingly is no small thing. Although these manifestations may seem minor, they may occur dozens of times a day. You know how it feels when someone self-righteously declares, "I told you so!" - or more subtly exhibits their right-wrong attitude by "looking down their nose" at you or anyone else who does things differently than they do. In whatever form it appears, right/wrong thinking is an energy drain, yet one that usually goes unnoticed. After all, as far the perpetrator is concerned, those others really are wrong!

Right/wrong thinking is deeply embedded and actively encouraged in cultures such as ours, in which everyone - from students in school to employees in the workplace - is "graded" according to external standards that have little or nothing to do with our innate and unique personal worth.

Right/wrong thinking is a reflection of the zero-sum fallacy: the belief that if one person (or group of persons) succeeds, or wins, someone else (the other team, the other guy, the other nation) must necessarily lose. Once you learn to look for these patterns of right/wrong or better/worse thinking, you can see and hear them everywhere: in media headlines, in daily conversations, and definitely in your own mind. The programming is so strong, and one that people align with so closely, that some of us would rather be dead than wrong.

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